Lately, I have been overjoyed and very thankful for the unveilings of truth that the recent cosmic energy has bestowed upon my life. Lately, I've been feeling a strong pull to move in a different direction. Blog content has been limited, but personal life has been flourishing while I move toward figuring out all of which God is telling me. I've had a series of epiphanies and revelations that have fallen into my life over the last several months. I've always been able to recognize when I am experiencing a deep sense of awakening throughout the years, but this time has felt seemingly different. This time has felt like a portal of the unknown and familiar has opened all at once and merged together in my life. My tolerance for lower vibrational energies is at none. My ability to empathically sense the pain in others is strong. My psychic abilities are running rapidly and are more heightened than ever before. I feel at home in my body but distant from myself all at once. My dreams are like watching a movie reel play before my eyes while I am asleep, they too have become very telling. I used to find it really difficult to decode my dreams but when I return to my body in the mornings I somehow know exactly what message I needed to take from the experiences in my dreams.
The most important feeling I've felt is lost... I know many of you may read and think lost? What is the important significance of being lost? Who would ever want to feel lost? It's important to me because this growing intensity or urge that I've felt to release and let go to find my way back to my truth brings me many feelings of contentment. I don't know what God has in store and for the first time I feel no desire to want to control it, I am confidently lost. Prince's "Way Back Home" plays in my head at random times most days. (Side Bar, I have a really deep spiritual connection to his Art Offical Age album, but that's another story to tell.) It's like I've been breaking down so many barriers and disconnecting from everything that I thought I knew or thought I needed. Any patterns of feeling obligated to be a certain way or live a certain way are no longer being carried out. The lessons on this path have been learned and I suddenly feel confident in my ability to surrender and ascend on a new path. It's time to move. It's time for a change!
Many of you have followed me on this career journey. Those of you who have been here from the beginning know how much of a joy this growth has been. I have written about my self-love journey since 2012. It's been a trying one for me. Some periods in my life were heavier than others but I managed to build a platform that inspired others to put themselves first and heal their trauma. It wasn't until 2016 that I started to feel as if I was drowning in my work. The path that I was on stopped fitting me. I started to feel as if I was forcing myself to produce content to publish on my blog. Everything seemed repetitive. I stopped feeling passionate about my contributions. It all had begun to feel like an obligation. It was like trying on a skirt 3 sizes too small and praying for it to not burst at the seams. I knew that my direction was changing a long time ago but I tried fighting it so hard. I wanted to remain where I was because frankly, it was all I had known for so many years. I had built my brand around all of it, but deep down in my core, I knew that my work never defined me. I knew that there would come a time where I had served my purpose and God would reveal to me that it was time to move forward to new things.
I wish that I could be open and vocalize all of the things that I am presently working on, but I can't. I will say that everything that I working on and pursuing is my heart's dearest passions. I am in space in my life where this next phase is all about my bliss and joy. This phase in my life is all about doing what feels good to me on a soul level. I am done with the extreme work. My only mission now is awareness and to have fun. I've let go of chasing a dream or a facade. I've broken up with trying to appear a certain way or live up to the world's expectations of me. "You're a lightworker, you're an energy healer, but you drink a lot and you're not vegan." Welcome to fucking reality people!!! The Universe told me that it is time to stop serving the world and serve myself. It is time to stop medicating and pacifying the world around me and focus on manifesting the reality I desire. I pray that my life continues to be a guiding light and inspiration to you all. I pray that you still follow along on my journey and are inspired by the work that I continue to put out into the world.
I do hope that you all understand and respect that this period in my life is about me. It is about growth, change, and understanding that I am meant to be creative and share my gifts with the world in more ways than one.This journey I am on is all about my experience, what I love and what fills me up. It is to be felt, not seen. I am enjoying the fruits of my human experience but simultaneously attached to the reality of my spiritual existence. I am fully in tune with who I am on a soul level. The two are not separate. While it may appear to others that the two are indifferent, they are truly one. I don’t believe in trying to force my beliefs down other’s throats by trying to prove I live a certain way based on my speech, appearance or programmed tweets on Twitter. I am me. Take me or leave me. I am not here to create an experience based on how I think I should be living. I am here to live in my truth, however, that may look. I am positive that it doesn’t require me trying to fit in to appease the masses. I pray we all find the courage and strength to be who we are at our core without feeling as if we have to live a certain life to prove who we are within. Here's to living the life that aligns with our truth for the rest of our days. Blessings!